hi i hated my mom growing up?
Are there any tips on how to have a good relationship with your child?Pregagnt with first child and seeking advice on how to raise a child not to hate you?
Be open-minded and light hearted. Teach your child empathy and to care about the world around them.
On a basic level read to your child daily, make sure they have a good education (learn about life and differences), love them, talk to them, set fair rules, and be a parent not just a friend.
If you are worried about it then take a parenting class. But I'll bet you will do fine. Learn from the mistakes between you and your parents. Learn and grow, that's all you can do.Pregagnt with first child and seeking advice on how to raise a child not to hate you?
I'm preganant with my first as well. And I have been wondering how to be a good mom also. On one side, you want to protect your little one from everything, impart on them what you know, and help them with their problems. On the other, You can't always be their friend, and sometimes you just can't help.
I've set up a few rules for myself already. Just somee things that my parents did, that I don't want to repeat. For one, I away want to be honest with my kids, even if the truth hurts. And to be honest with myself about them. (no delutions because I love them). Also, the reasons, because I said so, or because you live under my roof, aren't good reasons. If I can't come up with a good reason as to why they shouldn't be doing something, then what right do I have to stop them?
Of course there are a few things I want to try and do as well. Like listen, not only to what they are saying, but what they mean. To be there for them, and to support them. Also, not to decide on their personality. I hope I never say, well my childs going to be a doctor/mortition/school teacher/McDonalds worker/ect, or get the idea in my head that they Will be good at something. I want to let them be their own person, and support them in whoever they become.
I know a lot of this may be foohardy, (especially thise experianced parents). But, I think, that in the end it'll be worth it.
i am a mother of 5 boys and i love them to death, my advice to you is be strict when it's needed, don't spoil them, communicate, be open and honest to your child never lie to them cause that just teaches them to lie. just remember everything you hated the most about your parents and try to raise your child different. me and my boys are very close we talk about everything and i love it, my oldest is 13 and believe me they come and talk to me before dad only due to I'm with them all the time. stay positive and raise your child the way you want to but stand by your word and rules. good luck I'm sure you'll do fine
Love them, unconditionally. Praise them when they are being good, instead of only giving them attention when they are bad (as a lot of parents do). Most of all, be consistent with discipline. If it was ';no'; today, it needs to be ';no'; tomorrow. That way your child will know what is expected of him (or her) and not be confused. Children are eager to please their parents, but they need limits set, as they are too young to control their emotions. No child ever listens as well, as when he is being praised. Give them lots of love and attention. Listen to them, when they have a question, and try to answer it as honestly as you can. Read to them, a lot, that is a good time to be close . Best of luck for a happy, healthy baby.
my mom is my best friend not only because she was a parent to me but also a friend, there needs to be a balance make sure you are open if your child has a question answer it because if you don't someone else will, just make sure you are always there. let the child live and experience things and try not to shelter it so much it is human it is going to make mistakes
Read books and take some parenting classes.
People tend to raise their kids the same (or similar) as they were raised. When they had an unhealthy childhood, it's important to break that cycle. But the problem is, you may not have had good parenting modelled for you.
I recommend ';Parenting with Love and Logic';. Also, read on child development, so you know what your child should be doing at what age. As a parent, it's important to have reasonable expectations of your children.
Good luck!
This is from a 13 year old's point of view. You need to lead by example. Do not scream at your kids, unless you want them screaming at you. Talk to them calmly, (sternly also if necessary) and they will speak to you like you're a human being; not a dog. Be accepting of them NO MATTER WHAT! You get to live your life how you wish, so they should get the same opportunity without mom's expectations influencing them. Be sure to teach the child MANNERS when they are young. Etiquette goes a LONG ways. My parents never taught me etiquette, and guess who I learnt it from? My american history teacher. Teach them to sit up straight when they are sitting, to close doors quietly, to cover their mouth when they yawn, to say ';excuse me'; when someone is ';in their way';. Another huge thing to teach them is that they must ';choose their battles';. If nothing is to be gained from an argument, don't partake in it. If someone says, ';This school is so stupid.'; and they believe otherwise, they shouldn't get in a huge, full blown argument over it. Also, teach them to love themselves. Whatever life throws at them, they can take it. Teach them that ';What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.';, because it is so true. It is really beneficial if you try educating them (e.g. reading, writing, foreign language) at a young age, because this will help their maturity, I've come to find. My parents are very conservative, and I'm openly gay. Guess what that creates? Tension. Major tension. You MUST be accepting of your child if you expect them to embrace you with open arms. Throw away the old-school customs/ideas, your child will be growing up in a new era. Be confident of yourself, and your child will mimic your actions. Good luck!
Hi. There is really no great strategy but be their parent and not their friend. Show them you love them by listening to them and not always judging. Displine them but make sure they understand why they are being displined. make sure you tell them and show them you love them by simply praising them when they do well, giving hugs, placing a kiss to their cheek or forhead, being their when they need you and letting them learn some things on their own.
Hope this helps.
i hated my mom and still do. if you want your child to love you my advice is always be encouraging and supportive. if you have a girl don't say she's fat when she's a size five and don't tell her she's not as pretty as her sister. don't purposely try to hold him/her back from their dreams and goals just out of spite and jealousy. that's all i got but if my mom hadn't done those things maybe i'd give a **** if she lived or died.
well, you need to teach her manners and good things when they are very young because then they understand more on how to act
hug them every single day sounds weird but studies show that if you hug your kid every day it will decrease 30% on their chance of using drugs and throwing tantrums
if they get mad and yell you need to understand, and not get mad, if you listen they will get calm
dont spoil them, a nice treat every once in awhile is great but not too much
and finally let them grow, trust them to become a great independant person, but you need rules so dont automatically trust them they have to earn it
Hi... i am 51 years old, and i don't particularly like my father, either.
I have two grown sons, and we have good, close relationships. that doesn't mean that i didn't make my share of mistakes.
I did encourage my kids when they wanted to try something new.... i was supportive, even if i thought they'd fall flat on their faces.
I spent time with the kids.. reading, and doing things which were sometimes boring to me, but they enjoyed it... i also got them to help me decorate cookies, and we did little things together... every christmas we made simple gifts or cards together so they could present them to grandparents or close relatives. so we made traditions. I tried to be involved with their school activities, too.
I didn't scream and yell at them all the time, although just like anyone else, i did raise my voice once in a while (sometimes we just can't help it)... I did not expect them to get all A's, when they were struggling just to get a B. One of my kids got A's easily, the other, not so good. I tried to help as much as i could.
When they did something wrong, i usually talked with them about it -- asked them why they did whatever it was, and how they felt. Recently, one of them told me that it was good for them, but sometimes they'd rather have had a spanking (LOL).
I didn't indulge in name-calling, friend bashing, or put-downs... i didn't hit them at random (however, each one of them got one spanking during their lifetimes, and they deserved them!).
I tried to be a good listener.
I also tried to be a good example, but wasn't always that great... i did, however, let them know when i made a mistake. I didn't want them to look at me and think ';this woman thinks she's perfect and superhuman';... because i'm not.
I also enforced rules and tried to be consistant. I said NO when i had to, and did expect my kids to behave.
I respected my kids, when they were young... things as simple as saying ';please'; and ';thank you'; and giving praise is showing them respect. I got a lot of respect in return, as well.
There are a lot of good parenting books out there... if you are unsure, maybe something like that would help?
I'm sure you will be a good parent... especially since that's what you want to do..
take care and i hope you get a lot of good suggestions here.
Be open and communicate. I have a 15 yr old who I do not talk to. i hate talking to him as much as he hates talking to me. He hates me. We go to parenting classes (court appointed) and the most common thing is communication and open love. tell them you love them, hug them everyday. and never give up and stop showing your love. this is easy for the 1st 10 years, until they become their own person.
-Like the others said be open %26amp; communicate.
-No physical disipline.
-read up on developmental psychology.
-Set firm rules %26amp; appropriate consequenses to benefit the child not yourself.
-Don't nit pick at her to much..especially her appearance
remember the things that you didn't like about your mother and try not doing all those things to your own. be open and talk to your child every chance you get and be a parent as well as a friend.
They love you until around puberty, then they hate you for awhile. Then they love you again.
You have to be a parent, not a friend. They can find friends, they only have one mom.
Attachment Parenting
Victoria's answer and be supportive and open to conversation is a good start.
Be their parent, not their friend.
well they told me to just talk to him
